Elf: Road trip to Kansas City before North Pole bound
BY Peter Elf
Well, after having a fun weekend in Omaha a couple of weeks ago, I decided to keep it going. I heard a song called “Kansas City, Here I Come.”
So, I thought, what the snowflake?!
Wow! Does Kansas City have a lot to offer.
I thought I’d grab some breakfast at a place called City Market. It’s a historic farmer’s market. I thought I would grab some fruit and croissant.
While, searching for a place to eat, I came across an old nemesis turned friend.
Mr. Grinch – you know him. Dr. Seuss wrote a biography about him.
Mr. Grinch, once an angry old soul, is now one of Christmas’ biggest supporters. He, along with little Cindy Lou Who, works to help the hungry in the Kansas City area. They gather donated food and money for local food banks.
I wanted to have my picture taken with them. But, I felt a little self-conscious. I am a bit on the short side compared to the Grinch and the folks in Whoville. But, I met a nice girl, who happened to be from Omaha, where I am stationed this holiday season.
She is a queen or something. She wore a crown and a sash.
She sat with me so I looked larger in the picture. I appreciated it, and have already advised Santa on her kindness.
On my way, just for kicks, I grabbed a quick pose with a plastic Grinch. 
My next stop was at a place called Dutch Flower.
I found a neat ball hanging from the ceiling, so I thought what the heck? I jumped on and took a ride. No, I wasn’t imitating that brat Miley Cyrus (she’ll be lucky to get a lump of coal) doing her song “Wrecking Ball.” I know other elves who have done this song. I just wanted to take a spin.
After my City Market fun stops, I realized I hadn’t eaten, so since it was lunch time, I thought I’d try out a local barbecue place.
I scoured the menu at Winslow’s. I found what I thought would be a great lunch – a combo. Three meats and a couple of sides. Yum! I was so stuffed. But, I had to trudge on.
I caught a ride to Union Station.
They have a great pirate exhibit going on a couple more weeks. Hint: See it!
Pirates have a bad reputation. I am not sure they ever get gifts from Santa. I wanted to change that. I visited with a couple of the scurvy mates of a ship called The Whydah.
Um, let’s just say, the tradition of Santa passing them up on Christmas will continue.
Well, in the need for a pick-me-up, I ventured off to the Country Club Plaza.
I took in some light viewing.
But, then, I found it! A place called It’s Sugar. Man, a bottle of Hershey chocolate sauce and tons of candy. Oh, man! Was I in heaven? “No!” someone yelled. “Missouri.”
Well, after refilling my sugar levels, I moved on to some more light viewing.
Then, I decided to warm up with a latte at Starbucks. Yum!
I grabbed my latte and headed out to cool with some ice skating, just like we elves do the day after Christmas, when we finally get a day off and blow off some steam.
Man! Skating works up an appetite. I headed to the Polar Express Café for a quick dinner. Oops! I guess the humans call it Fritz’s.
I called in my order, and I enjoyed a burger and fries.
The next day, I relaxed while watching humans tour the 18th and Vine District, including the American Jazz Museum and Negro Leagues Baseball Museum.
Then, before I headed back to Omaha, I grabbed lunch at Arthur Bryant’s BBQ joint. This is the original location and was great.
Well, this is likely my last communication, before heading back to the North Pole. The Trudell family will get good marks. Even, that cat! He came around, and instead of trying to kill me, he actually cuddled up. I overheard his dad telling him something about Christmas, coal, and being nice.
Merry Christmas! Happy Holidays! Feliz Navidad! Joyeux Noel! Frohe Weihnachten! And God Jul!
Happy New Year, too! See y’all next holiday season.
